Everyone who has ever bought a house will enjoy this.
A
New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA loan for a client. He was told the
loan would be granted if he could prove satisfactory title to the
parcel of property being offered as collateral. The title to the
property dated back to 1803, which took the Lawyer three months to
track down.
After sending the information to the FHA, he received the following reply.
(Actual letter):
"Upon
review of your letter adjoining your client's loan application, we note
that the request is supported by an Abstract of Title. While we
compliment the able manner in which you have prepared and presented the
application, we must point out that you have only cleared title to the
proposed collateral property back to 1803. Before final approval can be
accorded, it will be necessary to clear the title back to its origin."
Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows:
(actual letter):
"Your
letter regarding title in Case No. 189156 has been received. I note
that you wish to have title extended further than the 194 years covered
by the present application. I was unaware that any educated person in
this country, particularly those working in the property area, would
not know that Louisiana was purchased by the U.S from France in 1803,
the year of origin identified in our application.
For
the edification of uninformed FHA bureaucrats, the title to the land
prior to U.S. ownership was obtained from France, which had acquired it
by Right of Conquest from Spain. The land came into the possession of
Spain by Right of Discovery made in the year 1492 by a sea captain
named Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of
seeking a new route to India by the Spanish monarch, Isabella.
The
good queen, Isabella, being a pious woman and almost as careful about
titles as the FHA, took the precaution of securing the blessing of the
Pope before she sold her jewels to finance Columbus' expedition.
Now
the Pope, as I'm sure you may know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ,
the Son of God, and God, it is commonly accepted, created this world.
Therefore,
I believe it is safe to presume that God also made that part of the
world called Louisiana. God, therefore, would be the owner of origin
and His origins date back, to before the beginning of time, the world
as we know it AND the FHA.
I hope you find God's original claim to be satisfactory.
Now, may we have our DAMN loan?"